Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts

An engineering student attended a medical exam by mistake. See his answers... 👇


1. Antibody - One who hates his body .

2. Artery - Study of Fine Paintings .

3. Bacteria - Back door of a Cafeteria .

4. Coma - Punctuation Mark .

5. Gall Bladder - Bladder of a Girl .

6. Genes - Blue Denim.

7. Labour Pain - Hurt at Work .


8. Liposuction - A French Kiss .

9. Ultrasound - Radical Sound .

10. Cardiology - Advanced Study of
Playing
Cards .....

11. dyspepsia : difficulty in drinking
pepsi.

12.Chicken Pox- A dish

13.CT Scan: Test for identifying person's
city

14.Radiology- the study of how Radio
works

15.parotitis : inflammation of parrot

16. Urology: the study of european
people



😂😂😂😂😂

Unknown

Quotes that can make you laugh and think at the same time. laugh. lol

One day there was a Bihari going in a Fiat Car at 45KMPH on a highway and enjoying his drive.
Suddenly a Sardaji came Booiiiiiiiiinnnnnnn on a Honda and peeped into the car and shouted at the Bihari - "Kabhi honda chalaya kya?" and sped off, The Bihari was surprised but he did not bother. After some time the Surd came Booiiiinnnnnnnnnnn... in the opposite direction, peeped into the car and shouted again "kabhi honda chalaya kya?" and sped off , This time the Bihari was annoyed , since the surd was teasing about his driving.
After some time again the Surd came back speeding and said the same thing peeping into the car. The Bihari was about to say something but the Surd goes off. This time the Bihari increased his speed but suddenly stopped as he found the Surd lying on the road, bleeding. He got down and mocked at the Surd "Kyon Surd , Kabhi Honda chalaye kya?" The Surd said "Wohi to puch raha tha, Mein Brakes ko dhoond rahatha."


Santa and a friend are sitting in a cinema. Just before the break they see a cactus and in some distance a cowboy. During the break the friend says to santa:"I bet the cowboy will ride into the cactus."
Santa answers: "I do not believe that."
They agree that the loser invites the winner to a bottle of wine after the film. It turns out that the friend wins. So after the film they drink together the bottle of wine in a restaurant near the cinema.
Then the friend says: "I must confess that the bet was not fair. I saw the film for the second time."
Then Santa replies: "And I saw it for the fourth time, but I did not think that this fool rides into the cactus again."







Santa and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."
His second friend says, "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber, the other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."
Santa says, "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No I'm serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."


Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song.After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down?
Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.


Santa Singh: "My doctor told me to drink carrot juice after a hot bath to cure my cold."
Banta Singh: "Does it work?"
Santa Singh: "I don't know... I can never finish drinking the hot bath

Unknown

Nuihchiam - II

  • Print
Vungzamuan Valte | Friday, 21 September 2012 20:09 | Vungzamuan Valte | Hits: 1233

Hinkhaw nuamsaktu a tamtheipen bawl khe le chihhuaina tel e:
41. Songtal papi khat le kipilsak deuh hiven, sapte a pil uh na chi ua, puannuai a zang ka lit leh a thei teuh kei, chizeih dan ahi.
42. Mikhat le a khualzinna lam ah inntekte nungak zanlai a gem khualkhual, nungaknu kikoukhia inchin a inntekpa`n a khawnvak ngamkhat a heksang zot (lupna gei a kikoih hiven), mikhualpa zahmoh lim khong chu innbaang khong a kikhai goigoi maidan ahih chu, (Shadow).
43. Khua khat a le tangval khat luck lawtel mahmah, khosung nungak ten`, “a hatlou pen in Lianpu kitenpih di” chi ua tai suangsuang zel uh, Thangnu pen bang houh hat zawzen, a hatpen a pang gige. Himahleh, Lianpu pen Thangnu toh kiteng daih uh (pilna chikhat ahi, lawmte khem ngai).
44. Nupi khat le chiamnuih hat lawtel, na damthei thou hia, koilam teng le? Khatin achih thahah leh, a hahchiau thei lai, hitaang nap le tolhsak thei laisam ahi, chi.
45. Nupi fel mahmah khat le papi khat toh kihoulim uh, numeite thilneih khong genkhawm ua, numei nawi neideuh louz-aw chih. Khat nu`n pasalte na houh houh utoh, huai numeite chi-gah leltak khong, na kipahna uh le a houh houh toh chihsan hiau.
46. Nupi khat le sum tampi muphut inchin, ei zaw kizawng lua inchin, tua sum hiai zahzah ka muh leh ASALAM DOG million ka hi, chizeih. Midangte hunchia`h a mu tam mah du, chizawmah lai.
47. Papi khat le ann ne lai, a chil dawk hehhoh zenhouh, a tate`n taiteh a tepsak uh, hehdi lah hilou, nat –lah-na bok-si, na pianna uh ahi, pheiphuai gouh, chi ek sam.

48. Nupi khat le a nesemte intunglam a kal ganggang uh, khat in khekor tom kol depduap teng hiven, a nuailam apat chu a keltal chilpol gah nih kai giahgiah kimuthei, nupi nu`n enlah sim hiam a, chiang kang a dawt tou gang gang, a sapna hi maithei chi uh.
49. Andrews Ganj a kikhopna kipan hiven, khatvei kikhawm zou mi pai sasauh uh, papite kitchen a tukual ua sakramen chituam deuh hawm uh, maizen pu Khai in hihding nei a kilehkik zual, kitchen a va dak zenzen, inntek pa hamhaihgawp in, “Khai-a, na deihtei hia?” Chi kha zawzen, khatpen in, “zenzenzenzenzenzen”, chia paisan hiau.
50. Khua khat a le, pasal khat kichei ut mahmah om, coat suit toh travalta toh pai trahtrah deuhreng, nunglam ah chu Devahan a bang chi ua, paikhel vatvat a palak khat in a mailam va en inchin, e he hee, aa khai, NON KHEM CHIANG VE, chih khum mawk.
51.Nupa kiteng thak khat om ua, zing annnek lai a numei pen nuinui maimah, a tawp a kidamzoulou, “da`ntah a ei gel neunuau pi, neunou tazen”, chia nui ek ek zawmah, a pasal pen mai san um um.
52.Mi khat le zi deih lua inchin, puan ak hilou, pheikhok le hilou, khekor le hilou ka deih, kingaihtuah ua, chia a nu leh pa te sal loiloi. Mi khat in lah, zi nei fuh kisa-sim zaw hiding hiven, aa khai a, akiman eem mai, a man va piak behlap ua, chia a pate sawl mawk, chihdan ahi.
53. Veng khat a le tuailaite kikhawm unchin, a thohlawm khonte uh latna khat in nei, a thuum zoh tak ua a thohlawm uh ana mang hiau.
54. Lamphel papite hi seselou, khat le kikhopna ah alawmpa ihmu derdar hiven, veih pekpung mawk, a ihmupen kawk chenchen, mi tengteng in a lawmpa en kheukhou maimah uh, heh lawtel a.
55. Khawkhat a le nupite kikhawm teisam unchin, khat in thohlawm latna hon nei, Aw Toupa, hiai ka zaat-sawm uh, chithahah. Zatsawm chu kimawl munsim uh hihtuak.
56. Papi khat le thumna nei venchin, Aw Toupa, hiai ka thohlawm uh, Asoka Hotel a zankhat tunman le phakei mahleh, chi tetauh mawk.
57. Nupi khat le a pasal neih nunga laithon mu, a et leh appointment lehkha hiven, kikoukhe tualtual mai, U Thang ei, U Thang e, hiai kaam ka muh di lam thei leng hon neilou mah di hi`ng a aw, chi vangvang mawk, a pasal in phunlou paulou a office kuansan phanphan lel.
58. Palsal khat le khualzin sawtsim zaw hingei di hiven, inn atuntak a innleeng om kheukhou mawk uh, amah le bathroom a kibual hanhan, a ngaih a ngaih a, ka nung honnawtsak uai chia kikou tuaituai maimah, sawtsimtak zaw kinawt uh hihtuak, chidan uh ahi.
59.Papi khat le khopi a khosak hautak sa-lawtel, elektic fee le tamlua, chi`a a sungkuante zoudawnlam a paisak geih, amahbel kitoudelhtak ahingei di`a, ATM cabin a giak zeih zel.
60. Nupi khat toh papi khat houlim ua, nupinu`n pasalte na buaihuai huai u`toh, chimawk, khat pa`n le bang chidan in e, chi. Nupipe`n kipan taktakta, numeite maw I nau neihneihna khong kepkep, thuapthuap, belhbelh, repair pair ngai ahi, pasalte na lungkimna ding uh ahautak lua uptodate ngaiden chi, daih mai a le.
61. Nupi khat le anumeilam ki-at hiveh aw, operation theatre apat honsawn pawt uh, a nunu in hehpihlua hiding hiven, Bawi, bang na duh a, naa nasa hia? Achih leh, harhlou deuh kawm a, Khaini ka duh, ka neh ah hon koihsak ua, a nuamtuan di, chi, a nu`n le, lawmlawm tel, awwww.
62. Nupi khat le foreign a zinkhia hiveh aw, khaini, kuber, raja muzou mawng2 lou, a lohngaihna theilou, a puakteng lah bei sipsipta, a tawp atawp a India te omkhawmna deuh musuah inchin va guk-kan siausiau, Dollar 5 a kuber packet khat lei toih maisam eive.
63. Paipi khat le thaiboi lawtel mahmah, electric switch gei a ding reenroon kawm a, “hiai a ka fan “on” sa kua ahia off, kindeuh in hong on heh aw, chia ding phenphan.
64. Papi khat le gari lei inchin, driving zir ut bilbellou, a zizi in nervous kawmkawm a khalh nitnit, alawmte`n bang dia na lei e, chih leh, nupite`n a sun a zan a ahonpuak di mah uh ahi, painalam di control tu ka hi chi-a a front seat apat huailam ah, hiailam ah, kawl oh, chi-a kawk-kual zatzat.
65. Nupi khat le a lawmte`n birthday lopna a beer pe zenzen uh, nitak dorka kikhop a pitu lah hingalsi, biakin sung a angaih a ngaih a , Aw Toupa Ngaidam aw Ngaidam aw, beer chauh hi beer chauh hi, chia kuamah theipihlouh pi, kikou zaizai mawk.
66. Papi khat le a sungkuan te`n inn pawlam a chabi kalh-khum uh, pawtsak utlouhna nei uh zaw hisim, khat pa`n innchawng tung apat a lawmte ladder dohsak a pawtkhe khaukhau, a khenchia khau a kiluai khia, a zizi in gimneihna nei, bottle vuak muveu ahihchia, theisuah, lawmlawmtel, mihing daai zaw kaih zoh di ahi kei chi inchin, thumna toh a panpan leh zou ngiingeei, force ahikei, lungsim ahi, chidan ahi, dik mahmah leh kilawm.
67.Kikhopna khat a le, conductor pa lusu naak lawtel mahmah a chiltui khong kai maimah, naakpuak durdur lai, khuangpupa`n ngaihdeuhmai a khuang khenpuak dum mai, thakhat a conductor pa kiguihzot a dingkhia, koi ah ka tuibuk, chizawmah lai.
68. Nupi khat kianga le alawm khat in, na pasal a melsiat siat toh achih leh, huaibang Salukkhan te khong I ngaihtuah kawma amai, chizeih. Pa khat leuleu lah chu, nitak a minsaplouh dipi samkha hiam a, lupna tung apat sual kidenna thruai, numeite a utlam uah chu a kheelpi guh uh a haat khopmai, chizawmah.
69. Mikhualpa kianga inntekpa`n, Lawma bang meh na duhpeen a, aksa hia, sanga hia, voksa hia, chia dong tuautuau hiveh aw, khual pa`n lah a om-om chi, hilou e na duhduh gen ve, sa bangchu a tam mai, chi thouthou, atawp a khual pa`n le aksa aw, chi. Inntekpa kipan taktakta, na duhduh hon pethei dinmun ah ding leng achihhuaitel maw, thriana, chidaih mai, kibeihdan chuomchuom.
70. Tangval hon in khatvei hoihbeih lawdeuh uh hiama, alak ua khatpa`n deihkhop lawtel mahmah, ekbuksung a uak uak maimah, luak di le omnawn zouzailou, lah uak thouthou. Gim kisalawtel zaw hiding hiven, bawkkhup kawm a mitsi diirdiar inchin a lawmte kiang a thukhak /thuchah bawlta, “ Lawmte aw, banghiam ka chih zenzen leh, ka nu leh pate kiang ah sih khamuanna ka nei chih anagensak un aw”, chisuah phong mai.
71. Biakin khat a le thugentu thugenlai a, khat a tutmun apat kikoukhia, heutupa na thugen a dik hauh kei mai, Jesu ai in Baptishtu Johan a upa zaw kei chiang mai, Jesu chu Pathian toh piangkhawm ahi uh chih le theilou pulpit khong ah na dingtei satliah ua, zah le na zak tehchai kei ua hia? Kum khe rang oh, zuau zuau gengen di hilou, Bible le sim hoihdeuh ve ua, chimawk dan ahi. Thugentu chu amhai mapmap tak ahi di, khuttum a lakthaw mai zuhia.
Source Zogam.com

Unknown

Nuihchiam l

Vungzamuan Valte | Friday, 31 August 2012 12:06 | Vungzamuan Valte | Hits: 1490
vungzamuanvalteKoihhoih pawl om leh bang achi dia, huihkhua a lengmang maimai lou ding in.
1. Pasal khat in a zizi thau salua inchin, lupchi`a om venvon maimah chi, zizi toh phalbi khovot nuai a blanket kikop zaw I kikar a huihpi nung huauhuau ahi, a nunga the-banga I bet tiitee di ahih kei ngal-leh, chidan ahi.
2. Papi khat toh nupi khat kihou, pasal penin Heutupa Tunson koi a sem ahi chi, nupi`n FEVICOL ah chi, pasalpen in a naak manchina duakduak e, EFICOR achihna hizawmah.

3. Papi khat in nupi khat kianga na pa uh koi office a kai ahi chia dong, a numei penin third flow-ver ah chi, pasalpan` chita duanduan in a, a paklun awm ve.
4. Pasalte nitaklam tukhawm liiliai, khat pa`n, zi neinawn dek ngeingei leng tuh, achih chiah leh a zi kongkhak a hong daak geugau, pasal pa`n le, ka zizi mah ka nei di.

5. Numei khat in a kisukkhak chianga, eh nanu su chikhanak, khatvei a pasal in zadah lawtel zaw hi dia, bangdia ka nu zahmoh na kou gige eita, na ut leh na nu su gen ve, chigega.
6. Pasal khat kikhawm khin biakin verandah a vandak eu-au kawm a, Sousial obligation pakhat chu zou kihinawn phot a, bawite tu`n koilam ah ikithrip dua le, chidan ahi.

7. Papi khat in a lawmte toh lunch break a ann ne ding chia tukual pempam uh, a lunch box a hon leh malta pumkhat anakigual ngeungau leltak.
8. Khatvei Delhi pasal khat in meh-namsia lunch dia pua, bawsakkha zaw hingei di, namse lawtel mahmah, a office kaipihte`n zusa puul om chia a office sungteng uh pheklekvek uh bangmah mutuanlou, daikhilkhial a lawmpa`n a bekanthu uih vivit ne miaumiau lel.

9. Khatvei office a mi khat in a lunch loupi ne phanphan, ka lawinu`n le tuni lunch hon bawlhoihsak namaizen e chisim geugau, office kaipih numei khat in a lunch box muzoulou, a omlaipen a hon chia nek di dan thei mahmah lou, a tawp a bua, mehpok hive`n vai-numei kulmut in a nethei mah di. Lawmpa lah paulou phunlou hial a a gilvah pingpeng zut hanhan zawmah.
10. Pasal khat in a zi simmohbawl deuh hiding hive`n, nana paikik maidiam chi, a zi`n tuphingphing in I ngaihzawng te`n pasal a neivekta kei dua chizeih, diklawtel zel.


11. Lawmta khat gamvak ua, khatpen singkung apat kin-gangdeuh a hong tuakkhia (kesuk), a lawmpa`n adu na hong kinkumngei chi, daktor kiensak uh, daktor pa`n bangchi kiak a achihleh, khat pa`n “sukkiak” chizawmah.
12. Khatvei mi khat intung apat kia hiveh aw, a lawmte`n veh ua, khatpen in lawma, hihna apat kiak toh inntung apat kiak koi ana zaw a, achih thahah leh nohdok ahi ziang mai.

13. Pasal khat in zi guksawm, a lawmte toh dawnkhawm ua phursang lakloh uh, a zi gukdi lamlam theinawnlou, mangngilh kha. A zizi di lungkham kisa dak 12 khawng satta ahih chia, a zudawnna ua vahoh, bangchi maimah e, ikiguk di la, vachi, apasal in le awle konzui mai di, chi.
14. Khatvei nupa a pawtnalam ua a pasal in khamlawtel mahmah, scooter a kipuak sawm uh, a nupi a nunga belh dekdak, inntekpa`n en vengveng kawm a, “numeite`n chu na pasalte muang tak nahi uh, chikawm a enliam vangvang, lungsim gimtak ahi di.

15. MP pu outhouse a nuambawm sa free om hiding hiven, pasalte va kisutuah khasek ua, beiseih nei chiatchiat chu, kitheisiam kawmtak leh kisuanglah simkawm a, ehem, “nang` na zouta hia?”, kichizeih zel uh achi ve ua. Carrom kap chikhempeuh, a guk a kigelkhe zeuhzeuh ua, MP pu bang amah chauh a tukha belbul sek chi uh.
16. Sungkuan khat le kuatehiam in ann nedia chial uh, phurdeuhmai a kuan nainai uh, a tuntak ua a chialtute intekpa`n inn kongkhak anahong, ann kanelakloh lai ua hiai ah anatu mai un aw, chigeih. A theihthak thak ua leh a chialtunu`n a chiallam anamangngilh.

17. Numei khat le haihotsim zaw hivenchin, office kai di cycle a tai vavauh, cycle shed a koihgaih, nitaklam a khe a pai baubau, inntun nunga theikhe nailo, a zingkar a phawksuah pan.
18. Nupi khat in annhuan zouta chia a sungkuante ann ne dia samkhawm, thumna le neikhin dimdem uh, cooker a hon ua leh tuivuak ana-om maimah, antang kha khalou hizawmah.

19. Papi nih thautuak mahmah Imphal a rickshaw a tuang uh, rickshaw pupa`n gik salua zaw hingei di hia, tamdeuh bill, khatpa`n asiam theihtawp a, lupa manga zaam e chi, rickshaw pupa`n le nangkhoi ani zaam lum e ne, achithahah leh “nang na lum e hai e, eigi nupi na lumteh hai e” chi.
20. Papi khat le sang lawtel mahmah, a zizi lah neu zawmah hiven, mi`n, na nupi a neu si a bangchi`n na lumkhawm ua, achih zenhouh ua leh aman`, khelam lou chu kakitan reng uh, chi.
21. Nupa khat le bazar kai ua a nupitoh scooter a tuang varvar uh hiveh aw, lampi a a lawmte tuakkha a khawlzual, huchia innlam zuan a tai varvar, lawmtawn a a zizi toh kihoulimtoutou uh, inn a tuntak a a tate`n papa ka nu la? Achih ua leh kuamah ana omlou maimah, ehehe, lamtawn a hong houlim zaw hi unga, koi a kia ahia kava en di chia kuankik vangvang, bazar apat a zizi hongpaitou ziahziah, akhai bangchidan ahia achih zenzen leh, hon ngailou na hi di chu, nangmah chauh a tai varvar hivechin chia pai babauh, hehhuai lawtel dia.

22. Papi khat le a zi ommoh lawtel mahmah, a zinpa khat toh kichukha uh hiveh aw, a thawm ging uh ngaikhe dide zawzen, a zinpa`n “kei a gol lua” chi inchin, a nupi`n le, “sathau nuh lechin Pak-sa in teh” chi. Zingkar beltak a intekpa thoukhia , maipum lianpipi tamtak bel a huanding a sawlta, a zi`n hiai zahzah bel ah takenteh achihleh apasal in sathau nuh lechin Pak-sa inteh, chizeih.
23. Naupangte`n Bible chang zir nainai uh,”Vahawmna a liangzang ah a tuang ding a…..” chi uh, apa`n, “bawite a dar ah chi ua a dar ah” chidan ahi.
24. Sande sikul naupangte`n, ke`n ka nu leh pa thumang chi khiukheu uh, heutunu`n pasal naupang khat kianga bangchidan in e chia dong, naupangin, “kei maw, ka nu`n khaini la dia honsawl chianga kuan pahpah”, chidan ahi.
25. Pau siamlouh le poithei lawzen a, rickhaw pu in sumneen lehdi ka neikei achih leh, pasal khat Delhi tungtung in, aw le ikimuh nawnchia`h aw, chizeih, koi a munawn di adiam a.
26. Pasal pilhuntawk kisa khat in Aizawl bazar a avan-zon muzou mahmah lou, beidong hithet a inntung, a sungte`n bang e na va zong chi`a dong uh, ama`n DUM chi, a mukei mah di chu.
27. Numei khat Aizawl a van leidia kuan, dawr neitu kiang a kapi mi`n hap roh achih zenzen leh, khatpen in “a naa ang a sin”, chidaih. Hon pet awh chih chu.
28. Bus ah midangte kianga khat in ka pu he bus hi khoi ah nge a khaam dawn chia dong, kua`man dawnglou, a kumna di a tuntak a hehehe, khaam o khaam o chi tuartuar, driver a khawl kei rengreng, Aizawl ah chu khaam chih kha tuklup theihna mun hidaih mai.
29. Mikhual khat in ann nekham pah, I va khamhma ve, I in thathlung em ni, chia dong uh, ama`n, ni e in thathlung eee, chivang vang zawmah. Na gil a vah a hia chi di sa hilai dep, kisuanglah chihna.
30. Mi`n na zintunna te`n bang hon mehpih ua le, chia a dot ua leh, gendidan om mahmah lou, Banhla ler a duai derder, chia dawng, nahtang lawk chu meh uh himaithei.
31. Kuahiam khat Silchar kholai a vialvak hiveh aw, kizuakte omna bulom tungkha, a taikhiak dek leh manbet uh, gendidan lah thei tuansam lou, kipek gunggung inchin a sana chu mang hiau, kan nawn ngam di lah hilo.
32. Nungak khat le kicheideuh a om, kihisak zawmah, kholai a vakzouphet, insung a limlang a kimelh deuhvel, a zahmoh zawn a khoih leh direct a khoihkha mawk, a khekorten dor kek, underpant lah tenglou, mi lak khong a kamkasak sengsung anahi maimah, lah kikheel der, makhai man chi.
33. Papi khat le nungak heel ching inchin, khatvei a nungak heelna a tapsak a puan kikhuh khat mu, kua na hia na puan hawk in chi gega, ngamkhat a puan kikhuh a laihkhiaksak zenzen leh a tapa pa nungak hel, apa honglut di ngaingamlou a kilukhuh anahi maimah, tuakfuh thou.
34. Lawmte khat in zi neihak law mahmah, a lawmte tate BA khong simta, ama tapa in bebebe chipan pan, bawi mutpuak theih lechin kon mutpuak ut, chidan ahi.
35. Delhi hohpanpan mikhat le nitak a khua lum salawtel mahmah, inntung a kahtou (terrace), mikhat analum derdar, maksalua hiding hiven en vangvang a abiang bengpuak chorh, innsung a tailut, khat pa`n le innsung a delh lut. A inntekpa anahi daih, nop tuak leiluai het kei maw.
36. Lawmta khat le kichouthei sim viau uh, khat pa SDO hiven, a lawmpa pen office tukverh/tawlet a va dak keukau, Khaikokam, en in hiai America tual ka sikna chia a khenuai valak, khatpen in office a gam lai bawl zialzial. America tual sikpa Imphal kholai a necktie ok kawm a slipper toh pai, a chetdan le tuam na e, chi`a changkang sa mahmah uh. K U ku K I Ki zaw gen dahmai ni. Tunitan a hia lawmta te kichouna beilou, kibuaisan deuhdeuh di bang maimah. Pildan tuam mahmah lel, khat pa`n Kuki gam bawl anahi der.
37. Tangval khat le bike a kikhoh varvar inchin, a headlight in nuailam kawk lawdeuh, police patrolling te phupuk zelzul, kitatkhiak ngaihna omlou, zep tualtual maimah uh, a tawp a sum neih teng laksak zawmah uh, pilva`n louh le phatuamlou taka hi.
38. Palsal khat in rickshawm lei venchin, a lawmpa Imphal kholai fan pih, lengtonghoih lei tung a kipeikipei maimah uh, RMC kong a nupi vanzuakte khong hawmdarh zelzul. Inn a tundek ua Chekon lak a siamsimta chi, a hekkoi ngaungau leh phkhri a tuaklut pih dup, a lamwpa`n maktheingei chileltak.
39. Tangval khat le nungak hel dia kuan, a numei omlou, a naute kia om, neulai ahichiang ua khongaihhuai sa, nitak zansawt tan a le numei tunglou lai, tangval pa`n a naute pawkhe zok inchin giahpih lemlum thahah. A khonunga a theih thakthak leh huchizel zel mah anahi uh.
40. Pa Thangvom toh U KKSiam kihouthei mahmah ua, birthday lawm di chia U Siam in sa va tawi, khat pa`n tunghaklua sa, na zangtang hia, achih thahah leh khatpa pai vengveng, kihounawn himhimlou hial uh, a sih tan un le a kihou lam uh kithei lou, pa tak ahituak uh chihna.
Khopi leh khoneu a I thil tuahte kikum le, a mangthang dia pammaih mahmah lawi om hi. Hehna dia laklouh hamham sawm ni. Hon share tei ua le.
Source zogam.com

Unknown

10 Hilarious Chinglish Signs

What happens when you mix Chinese and English? Well, you end up with Chinglish(中式英语 – zhōng shì yīng yǔ). Sometimes, Chinglish is just formed by using Chinese grammatical structures in English. Trying to translate Chinese directly into English will give you sentences such as “I very like play basketball” (我很喜欢打篮球 – wǒ hěn xǐ huan dǎ lán qiú) or “I with my friend together have dinner” (我跟我的朋友一起吃晚饭 – wǒ gēn wǒ de péng yǒu yī qǐ chī wǎn fàn). Other times, it is a result of trying to directly translate Chinese words for foreign things. That’s why I’ve had students ask me about “Christmas old man” (圣诞老人 – shèng dàn lǎo rén – Santa Claus) and the “fire chicken” (火鸡 – huǒ jī – turkey). Although the Chinese government is doing its best to eradicate Chinglish, thankfully they aren’t quite there yet. In many tourist sights, you’ll find an abundance of hilarious Chinglish signs. You’ll also find plenty of Chinglish on menus of restaurants, and you can even find it printed on shirts in local markets. For those of you who haven’t had the chance to laugh your ass off at ridiculous Chinglish all around China, I’ve built up a collection of some of my favorite photos from my years of living here. Here are 10 of my favorites

Unknown

Rajnikant Jokes



* Once Rajinikanth threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then grenade exploded !
* Sachin : The God of cricket......        Sehwag: The Rajinikanth of cricket
* Rajinikanth can kill a living room....
* Some people get lucky and kill two birds with one stone. Rajnikanth once killed four birds with half a stone.
    What? You say there's no such thing as half a stone? Well, the four dead birds didn't think so either.
* Rajinikanth can give missed call to his own number..!
* God created Earth and Heaven in 6 days , on 7th day he rested then he created Rajinikanth !
* Einstein Said: Everything is relative.

   Karunanidhi said: Relative is everthing.
   Rajinikanth said: I am everything.

* Rajinikanth doesn't answer nature's call. Nature answers Rajinikanth's call

* Govt of India pays tax to Rajinikanth for living here



* When Rajinikanth goes to a gym to workout, no one can workout since Rajini uses all the weights available.




* Einstein said you can't move at the speed of light, obviously he was never kicked by Rajinikanth

* Why Himalayas are rising? It's simple. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai. Lever effect.

* Adam and Eve are children of Rajinikanth

* Rajinikanth is so fast that he always comes yesterday

* Rajinikanth can get rid of his shadow

* Rajini's fav desert: Lal michi ki meetha kheer
* Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks

* Tornado changes course when it sees Rajini standing in it's way

* Police dept is bored because of 0 crime in the city where rajini lives

* Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajinikanth

* Rajini won the best actor oscar for his acting in a game of dumb charades
* The box office collection of the movie RA-One Was less than parking collection of ROBOT.......!
* Once Rajnikanth became the coach of Indian cricket team and guess wha India won the Fifa world cup !
* People update status from BlackBerry, iPhone, iPad, etc. Rajinikant updates his facebook status with a calculator !!
* Rajinikant got 150 questions in exam paper asking - "Solve any 100 questions" He solved all 150 and wrote, " Rascalla!, CHECK ANY 100!"
* Rajini participates in long jump once every four year.... And those years are called LEAP year
* Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss...The next day announcement was made... Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aaye
* Once Rajni was the guest contestant in KBC. Amitabh says: Computerji, Rajnikantji to phela sawaal poochiye. Computer: main lifeline use karna chahta hu.
* Ek bar Rajinikanth ne ek aadmi ko "Go to Hell" kaha... That person is now known as Yamraj !!

* Rajinikanth knows Ek chutki sindur ke kimat... Rs 0.0234355884

* Once Rajinikanth told joke to a little kid... Now he is known as laughing buddha

* Rajinikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box

* Once Rajinikanth used the support of a building to tie his shoe lace, the building is known as Leaning tower of Pisa.
* Rajinikanth knows those two persons.. who shake hands in NOKIA cell phones...!!
* Ram and Ravan were in a serious fight..
In the middle of the fight Ravan suddenly stopped after he saw someone standing behind Ram
Ravan : Acha chal bye..
Ram : Arey kya hua?
Ravan : Kuch nai ..bas bye
Ram : Arey lekin hua kya??
Ravan : Itni si baat ke liye Rajinikanth ko kyun bulaya yaar? :-)
* Rajinikanth's dog can bend a pipe with it's tail.
* Lord Shiva: Mera Trishul kahan hai ?
Parvati: Rajnikanth le gaya.
Shiva: Kyun?
Parvati: Maggi khaane ke liye !!!
* Michael Jackson's moon walk is no match for Rajinikanth's Sun Walk...
* Rajinikanth Calls In Indian Airlines- how long it takes for a flight from Chennai to Kolkata?
Airline:1 hour Sir.
Rajnikanth: Issey accha mein paidal chala jau..

* Munni Badnaam hui Rajinikanth ke liye

* Rajinikanth can make his wife admit her mistakes

* Rajinikanth doesn't enjoy animation movies because he can see the gaps between the 24 frames every second

* The reason why Rajinikanth stuttered in the movie Darr, because he saw Rajinikanth behind Juhi

* When Rajinikanth gets depressed, the world faces great depression

* Rajinikanth is a vegetarian… He doesn't eat animals until he first puts them into vegetative state with his blow

* If Rajinikanth's PC hangs… its time for next windows release…

* Rajinikanth can sneeze with open eyes.

* Rajini is the reason why we don't have any other superheros in India

* Rajinikanth can make 2 parallel lines intersect just by staring at them.

* Rajinikanth can make dog say "Meow" !!

* Santa Claus waits for a gift from Rajinikanth every Christmas.

* Rajinikanth taught yoga to Baba Ramdev.

* Rajinikanth taught us all... Impossible is nothing...

* One of Rajinikanth's hobby: Swimming on Tsunami.

* Sh!t happens to everyone.. Even to Rajini... One time he coudn't kill 100 bears with a single punch but only 99 died.

* Rajinikanth uses Ambuja cement as tooth powder

* Once Rajinikanth dropped a coin while he was standing in the belcony... He went down to pick it up, but it was not there.... hmmmm... He reached there before the coin...

* Rajinikanth was not amused by Gandhi’s non violence movement.

* Lifetime Warranty does not exist only because of Rajnikanth

* If you want a list of Rajinikanth's enemies, just check the extinct species list.

* When RAJNI had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.


Week 1

* The apple which fell on newton was actually thrown by Rajinikanth

* Only Rajinijanth has 32 wisdom teeth.

* When Rajinikanth goes thru immigration.. the officers show him thier passports

* Sun doesn't rise until Rajinikanth says 'Good Morning'

* Once Rajnikant, after chewing the 'PAAN', spit on the wall of a building.
Today that building is popularly known as THE RED FORT..

* Once Rajinikath shouted at a boy for not wearing cap in the hot sun.
Today that boy is known as Himesh Reshammiya.

* Rajnikanth Saw The Movie Break k Baad before the Break !!!

* Rajnikanth's pulse is measured in richter scale.

* Rajnikanth was practicing for a spelling test..the rough sheet he used is known as oxford dictionary..

* Rajnikanth has seen the face of the fat lady who owns the house in tom n jerry..

* Rajnikanth ploughs the field using nothing but his toes.

* Once spiderman,superman and batman visited rajnikant's house together.. it was teachers day!

* Rajinikanth can whistle and smile at the same time...
* Computer doesn't give warning message to Rajini… Rajini warns computer
* Rajini awards goes to Oscar
* Twitter follows Rajini
* When Rajnikant get angry at the Sun, it hides behind the moon… that phenomenon is called Solar eclipse.
* When rajnikant farts, all the girls follow him
* Rajini was born on 30th Feb, since then that date was removed from calendar so that noone else gets the same birthday.
* Rajnikanth can run Windows 7 on 64KB memory.
* Rajni never tweets, he only roars.

* Who can stop more than 50 cars with 1 hand... Trafic police.. Haar baar Rajinikanth thodi hoga...

* God is not Rajinikanth.

* Once Rajni was fined by cops for overspeeding at a 75 miles/hr zone... while walking ...

* Rajnikanth can send an SMS from a Landline phone.

* Rajnikanth doesn't write books... words assemble themselves.

* Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.
* Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.
* Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's.
* Rajni’s bike has semicircular tyres...
* We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.
* Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth.
* Every morning rajni goes for spacewalk.
* When Rajnikant dies..his tombstone will not read RIP...... ......... It will read.......BRB!!


* Ghosts have been debating for ages whether Rajinikanth really exists or not.
  But they are scared anyway.

* In Rajinikanth's wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajinikanth and his bride.

* Only Rajinikanth can kiss his own ass.

* Computer viruses are looking for Anti-Rajinikanth software.

* When Rajnikanth was a kid he made his mom eat her vegetables.

* The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Rajnikant out.
  They didn't know that Rajinikanth can walk through walls.

* Rajnikant can tie his shoes with his feet. Wink !

* In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Rajnikant.
  The ones listed are in second place."

* Rajnikant can make a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

* Rajnikanth and Superman once had arm wrestled and the loser had to wear his
  underwear over his pants... We all know who won..!! It was even worse for Spiderman.
  He had to wear his underwear over his head.

* Rajnikant irons his Pants with those still on.

* Rajnikant can squeeze orange juice from a banana.

* Rajnikanth can write into a READ ONLY file.

* Rajnikant once wrote his autobiography. Today that book is known as
  "Guiness book of world records" and his childhood homework is now called Wikipedia.


* What do you call Rajnikanth's Aunty ?? Rajini-Ki-Aunt !!!

* Rajnikant first takes the gold medal and then starts the race

* Rajnikanth went for morning walk...... In the afternoon police stopped him.. Because he
  reached USA without visa..!!!

* Rajni gave permission to Sachin to score those hundreds..

* Alfred Noble is nominated for RAJNIKANTH award !

* Rajnikant knows the exact value of Pi upto a Googol

* Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up.

* Some actor set benchmarks in cinema, Rajnikanth sets deskmarks

* Rajnikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life unless it gets in his way.

* Whenever Rajnikant makes an error, it’s an invention.


* Once God was surprised at something, he exclaimed "OMR" ("Oh my Rajnikaant!")

* There is no Ctrl button on Rajnikant's pc beacuse Rajnikant is always in control.

* Rajnikant cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down.

* Only Rajnikant knows Kaun Banega Crorepati.

* Only Rajnikant knows Choli Ke Peechhe Kya Hai.

* President is Indian citizen no.1...Rajnikant's number is 0

* Rajnikant twice won arguments with his wife.

* Rajini doesn’t need water supply. He can mix hydrogen and oxygen and produce water
   whenever he wants.

* There in nothing Rajini’Kant do.

* Rajnikanth runs until the Treadmill gets tired


* Rajinikanth wanted to organize a small show for his family and friends and
  that's how CommonWealth Games came to India.

* How did Paul Octopus died?? He was asked to predict Rajanikanth's death.

* The missing piece of the Apple logo was eaten by Rajinikanth.

* Rajinikanth's email id... gmail@RAJINIKANTH.com

* Rajinikanth had to make 24 runs in just 1 ball remaining. He hit the ball in such a way
  that it got broken into 4 pieces and he got 4 sixers.

* Genies rub Rajinikanth and he grants them three wishes.

* You will lose the game even though you have "3 aces" ... if the opponent have "1 Rajinikanth"

* Basketball player: "I can spin a basketball on my finger for 2 hours, can U?".
  Rajinikanth: "How the hell do U think the earth rotates? "

* Viagra needs Rajinikanth.

* Rajanikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

* Warning on Condom packet "There is no such thing as protection from Rajinikanth!"

* Even Gajini remembers Rajini.

* Rajinikanth wear sunglasses to protect the sun from his rage.

* Rajinikanth can piss his name in concrete.

* Rajinikanth was offered Aamir's role in "Ghajini" but he denied. Because Rajanikanth
  can only give memory loss.

* Rajanikanth can make onions cry.

* Rajanikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

* Rajinikanth can divide by 0 (zero).

* Rajanikanth can build a snowman... out of rain.

* Bullets dodge Rajanikanth.

* Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.

* Rajinikanth doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

* Rajinikanth once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

* Rajinikanth can handle the truth.

* Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.

* East India Company left India in 1947, because Rajinikanth was supposed to be born in 1949.

* Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.

* Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.

* Death once had a near Rajinikanth experience.

* A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the    spot belongs to Rajanikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

* Rajinikanth made an IPhone 8G for himself.

* Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.

* Once upon a time, a wild boar got in Rajinikanth's way & was pulled up by his nose & thrown 30 miles away. Today its    descendents are known as elephants.

* Rajinikanth doesnt pay attention - attention pays him.

* Rajinikanth stared at the sun for hours, the sun then blink.

* Rajinikanth once entered a race he came first, second and third.

* Rajinikath once wrote a cheque the bank bounced.

* Once Rajinikanth while playing the game said "Statue" to a lady. Today it is known as the Statue of Liberty.

* Once Rajanikanth participated in 100 mts race and obviously he won. Light came second.

* A girl once lost her virginity. Rajinikanth brought it back.

* Once Rajinikanth was playing cricket, and he hit a six.... Now the ball is called Pluto.

* One nite while sleeping, Rajinikanth was mumbling some random numbers... That was how the log table was invented.

* Face book, twitter and orkut join Rajini today.

* Once a photo of Rajinikanth was given to get it xeroxed.... but got 2 xerox machhines.

* Rajinikanth knows which came first,the egg or the chicken.

* Whales live in deep oceans.. because they know Rajinikanth lives on land.

* Rajinikanth can cut diamond with his finger.

* Rajinikath doesn't use condoms... there is no such thing as protection from Rajinikanth

* Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air    while the earth rotates.

* Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.

* There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.

* Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has
  encountered Rajinikanth".

* Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than death can process them.

* Only Rajinikanth can make wind visible.

* If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Rajanikanth?" It simply replies, "Run while you still    have the chance."

* When Rajanikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

* Rajanikanth can kill two stones with one bird.

* Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of    everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

* Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajanikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

* There is no such thing as global warming. Rajanikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up.

* It takes Rajanikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

* Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth.

* Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajanikanth only recognizes the element of surprise.

* Rajanikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.

* When you say "No one's perfect", Rajanikanth takes this as a personal insult.

Unknown

Sardar Nuihchiam


Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Two seconds later a report came to his phone and he started dancing.
The report said, "DELIVERED".
2. One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village???
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
3.After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife,


Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?

4.What is Common between : Krishna, Ram, Gandhiji & Jesus..?
Sardar ji Replied : All are Born on Government Holidays.
5.WHY WAS SARDAR JEE ARRESTED IN A POLITICAL RALLY. BECOZ HE SAW A GIRL GOING AROUND WITH A BADGE ON HER CHEST WHICH SAID"PRESS" AND SARDAR JEE PRESSED IT
5. 2 Sardars looking at Egyptian mummy.Sardar1:Look so many bandages, pakka truck accident case. Sardar2: Aaho, truck nambar bhi likha hai. BC-1760!!
6.Sardar on phone "Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now".
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Sardar: No this is her husband speaking............
7. Sardar: Will u merry , after i die .
Wife : No i wiil live with my sister.
Wife : Will u marry , after i die .
Sardar: No i will also live with ur sister
8.How do you make a Sardar laugh on "Saturday"?
Tell him "a joke on Tuesday
9.Sardarji is filling up a job application...........................
He promptly fills in the lines on Name, Age, Addr,& etc.
Then came the column Salary Expected.....................
After much thought he writes: Yes.............................


10.A Sardar saw a Beautiful Girl,he Went and Kissed her.
Girl: "STUPID what r u doing?"
Sardar: B.Com final year"
11.Sardarji calls Air India. "How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the receptionist. "Thank you." says the Sardar and
hangs up
12.A sardarji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister....
13.Waiter gives bill to Sardar
Sardar: "Take my card."
Waiter: "But sir, this is Ration Card."

14.A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.
Then a Little Sardarji spoke up: "We are all human beans."
15.A drunk was hauled into court.
Mister, the judge began, you've been brought
here for drinking..
Great, the drunk exclaimed. When do we get started?
16.A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house…
still he was in jail…….why?
coz all the 6 were fire brigade staff !
17.
Sardarji was asked,
what is a adult joke?
Reply came
any joke which is eighteen years old.



18.Sardar’s Leave application
Dear Sir,
My wife is ill.
As there is no other Husband
in the family to look after her,
Kindly grant me leave for one day
19.
Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Sardar ji: Yes it’s really strange.
I’ve got another pair of the same at home.

20.Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying….
When a person asked what he was doing….
He replied… Oye!! Higher Studies Yaar…!!!
21.
A Teacher lecturing on population –
In India after Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up-
we must find & stop her!.

22.How can a Sardar Kill a Lion ?
Sardarji thinks N thinks hard
&
comes to a conclusion:
I’ll drink poison n let lion eat me.
23.NURSE kept SARDAR’S FINGER in HER MOUTH
after BLOOD TEST.
THEN SARDAR STARTED DANCING .
NURSE:y r u DANCING.
SARDAR:next is URINE TEST
24.Teacher: “I killed a person”
convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is “u will go to jail”.
25.Sardar proposed a girl……
Girl said am 1 yr elder to u…….
Sardar said Oye no problem
soniye I’ll marry u next year.
26.Sardar got into a bus on 1st April
when conductor asked for ticket.
He gave Rs.10/-
and took the ticket and said april fool.
I have pass.
27.Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”
28.Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai.
Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
29.
Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Sardar: BA
Professor:For sodium?
Sardar: NA
Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Sardar: BANANA

30.Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
31.
1st ever intelligent sardar.
Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?
sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)

32.
A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can’t get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.

33.Sardarji to others:
Did anyone lose money wrapped in a rubber band?
One said, Yes I did
Sardar: Well, it’s your lucky day,
I found the rubberband!
34.
Four guys
1 from Harward:
1 Oxford
1 Texas
&
a Sardar from Pujab university
1 common question:
What is the fastest thing in world?
Oxford:Light
Harvard:Thought
Texas:Blink of an eye
Sardar:It’s loose motions,
because last night I was lying in my bed
& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,
it was over!

35.
Newspaper Mein News Lugi K
“50% Of Sardars Are Donkeys”
The Sardars Protested.
Next Day News Lagi K
“50% Of Sardars R Not Donkeys”
The Sardars Celebrated.

36.  Prince Charles & Sardarji were having dinner.
Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".
Sardar thinks "how poetic"
Sardar says, "pass the custard you bastard".
37.Java Interview attended by our Banta Singh
Q. What is the difference between an Abstract class and Interface?
A. Terms are different ... Nothing more
Q. What is JFC ?
A. Jilebi, Fanta & Coffee
Q. Explain 2 tier and 3 -tier Architecture ?
A. Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and autorickshaws will have 3 tyres.

Q. I want to store more than 10 objects in a remote server ? Which methodology will follow ?
A. Send it through courier.
Q. Can I modify an object in CORBA ?
A. As you wish , I do not have any objections.
Q. How to communicate 2 threads each other ?
A. Non living things can't communicate.
Q. What is meant by flickering ?
A. Closing and opening of eyes at girls.
Q. Explain RMI Architecture?
A. I am a computer professional not an architect student.
Q. What is the use of Servlets ?
A. In hotels, they can replace servers.
Q. What is the dif ference between Process and Threads ?
A. Threads are small ropes. Make a rope from threads is an example for process.
Q. When is update method called ?
A. Who is update method?
Q. What is JAR file ?
A. File that can be kept inside a jar.
Q. What is JINI ?
A. A ghost which was Aladdin's friend.
Q. How will you call an Applet from a Java Script?
A. I will give invitation.
Q. How you can know about drivers and database information ?
A. I will go and enquire in the bus dep to.
Q. What is serialization ?
A. Arranging one after the other from left to right.
Q. What is bean ? Where it can be used ?
A. A kind of vegetable. In kitchens for cooking they can be used.
Q. Write down how will you create a binary Tree ?
A. When we sow a binary seed , a binary tree will grow.
Q. What is the exact diffe rence between Unicast and Multicast object ?
A. If in a society, if there is only one caste, then it is Unicast, else it is multicast.
38.1 DAY SANTA N BANTA WERE STANDING AT 5OTH FLOOR OF A BUILDING
A MAN TOLD SANTA UR SON IS DEAD!!!!!!!!
HEARING THIS SARDAR GI JUMPED FROM 50TH FLOOR
AT 35TH HE REALISE I DONT HAVE A SON
AT 20TH HE REALISE I AM NOT MARRIED
AT 3RD HE REALISE "OH sh*t" ,,, I AM BANTA
39.A Sardarji went to US and had a meeting with George Bush.
George Bush: I want to show you the US advancement. Come with me. He takes him to a forest.
George Bush: Dig the ground. Sardarji did it.
George Bush: more…more. ..more… Sardarji went up to 100 feet.
George Bush: So now, try to search something.
Sardarji: I got a wire.
George Bush : you know, it shows that even 100 years ago we used to have telephones.
Sardarji became frustrated. He invited George Bush to India. Next year George Bush was in India
Sardarji : I want to show you our advancement. The same…he takes George Bush to a forest.
Sardarji : Dig it. George Bush does.
Sardarji : more…more. …. George Bush goes up to almost 400 feet..
Sardarji : try to find something. George Bush tries.
Sardarji : Did you get anything?
George Bush : No, there is nothing here.
Sardarji : you know, it shows that even 400 years ago we used to have WIRELESS!!

40.Banta asked Santa: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
Santa: Very simple, because he is PM not AM
41.An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.
42.sardar `s girlfriend removed all of her clothes and said
" Treat me like your wife" sardar picked up her clothes and started to wash them ............!
43.Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else.
44.santa wrote the result of his reserch, "If frog losees all its leg it become DEAF"
45.Museum Administrator: That's a 500 year old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
46.Lady: Time kitna hua hai?
Banta: Bra Panties.
Lady: Time poocha hai Nonsense.
Banta: Time hi to bataya hai 12.35
47.1- Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

Unknown

Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)